How Sadistic Tortures fly??

How Sadistic Tortures fly??
Close the jar and eat shit in front of her!

John comes home with a certificate.
Dad asks him:
– Edges as you passed?
– I continued contract with the fifth grade for another year!
The boy burst into the parents’ room and sees his dad on my to jump up and down, up and down. Parents were immediately stopped and while the boy’s mother dressed her query:
– “What were you and Dad doing?”
A mother explains:
– “You know, son, your dad has a big belly, and here and there my went up to help him straighten my dad.”
It this the son:
It this the son:
– “Well mommy vain wasting your time. When you’re at work, neighbors came and knelt on her knees and blows it back again.”
Sit beside the street a man with a cup of apple seeds. John approached him and asked him:
– What is that?
Nothing sale of apple seeds.
– And what’s it for?
– You eat one and you’re smarter than that.
John after a short reflection on the topic” Everybody tells me that I’m stupid”:
And how much it costs
25 dollars piece.
Give ones.
Since it is eaten, again spoke:
You see a 25 – dinar I could buy a kilo of apples, so to get 20 pips instead of one!
– There you are, but act!
– You’re right, give two more!

The maid requested a raise. The Landlady was very angry and said:
Well, Mary, tell me why you think you deserve a raise?
Not one, but three.
Okay, so tell me first.
The first reason I ask is that you raise his iron better than you.
Who says that?
It says your husband.
And that’s the other reason?
Because they cook better than you.
Do not tell me again to say that my husband?
Exactly, it says your husband.
And that’s the third reason?
The third reason is that I’m a better lover than you.
Landlady (now all red in the face) query:
Do not tell me that and it says my husband?
No, ma’am, it says your gardener.
How much do you want a raise?